Sunday, 29 September 2013 10:57

White Women, Black Men: Making Long Distance Relationships Work

As we all know, love is blind and often irrational. This is why you might end up falling in love with a lady or gent that lives in a state or country far far away from yours. There is no need to despair though! You can still successfully date white women or black men, even if they live thousands of miles away from you. All it takes is some patience and a bit of planning.

Online communication tools

Be it Skype or any other free online call program, those kind of tools will make your life a lot easier! If people managed to maintain long distance relationships with regular mail fifty years ago, you surely have many more chances with webcam communication. That is particularly useful if one of you is not so comfortable talking on the phone or writing mails. When you talk with a webcam, it is just as if you have gone for a coffee together. Yes, there is no option to hug or kiss each other, but a virtual kiss is better than nothing.

Time zone tuning

If you live in different time zones, communication can be a bit tricky. Do the math and find the hours that are convenient for both of you. If it is 10 in the morning in your time zone and 10 in the evening in your girlfriend's, don't be upset if she is holding a glass of wine in her hand. Your day might be just starting, but hers is ending and she deserves to relax. Of course, she should also be understanding if you haven't had your cup of coffee yet and are not that talkative. It takes some practice, but you will figure out a couple of hours per day that work equally well for both of you. And even if your schedules are crazy, you can stick to e-mails during the week and have longer webcam calls during the weekend.

Scheduling trips

If you find yourself hanging over the phone or lap top screen, waiting for her message, then you probably have really fallen in love with her! When long distance relationships get more serious and stronger emotions are involved, it can really be a pain to be so far away from your other half. This is where trip planning comes in. If you book tickets to visit each other, you will have something to look forward to and it will make those long lonely nights much easier. If only one of you can travel, consider sharing the ticket cost, so that more visits become possible.

Setting boundaries

Online relationships that evolve to become long distance relationships are a very real thing. This means that all the drama of regular relationships comes into play, if you are not clear enough about your expectations. If you think that what you have is an open relationship and you can still date other women and your girlfriend can date other men, then do say so. It is unfair if one of the two believes this is an exclusive relationship and the other is seeing it as just an experiment. Also, if you do not feel comfortable having to be home at a specific time every day for a Skype call, do make it clear that you need more flexibility.

White women looking for black men do not usually plan to end up with a long distance relationship, but if they fall in love, they will try it out. The same goes the other way around. With patience, honesty and flexibility, everything is possible! Sourav Datta